Having family stay with you is ever a dichotomy. I feel excited to see them again, nervous to be a good hostess, and concerned that they don't tell me what they want to do to spare me any extra work. When they leave I am a bit happy to return to normal, but overwhelmingly sad to see them go. As I get older I consider 2 choices and how dramatically they affect your life - a life close to home in which you feel the comforts of family, the familiarity of home, and only occasional instances of surprise or adventure. The other choice is a life far from home, every day is an adventure, but no immediate support from family and life-long friends. Both have pros and cons, and overall I've chosen the latter path, but often I have yearned for the former. I wonder if those who have chosen the former ever yearn for the latter.
So here I am in India, once again 12,300km from my family, once again only able to converse in the early morning or late evening with any of my siblings, once again feeling alone even though I have the best, most supportive husband in the world, and the 2 most wonderful children in the world.
As I said - ever a dichotomy.
One of the most amazing women I've ever met, and the dearest friend I have ever had, once reminded me that when I have made a decision or choice in my life, I need to remember that the choice has been made, the choice was probably the best one to make given the available information, there really is not any point in dwelling on the ramifications of an alternate choice since it won't make much difference, and I must now learn from the experience and figure out a way to make the most of everything. She said it her wonderful Texan way,
"Oh Well."
2 comments:
Put me in the camp of the former. Moved next door to my folks over 10 years ago. Living in my hometown. Working at my alma mater (can walk to work even).
Yes, there are times I think about what it's like living off someplace exciting. (A word which could never be used to describe my hometown, heh.) But I figure that's what vacations are for. :-)
Reading your blog, however, helps me to get a feel for living in more interesting areas and I always enjoy seeing what you folks have gotten up to lately.
Of course we have those longings, Tuffy! The grass always seems greener, doesn't it?
We all have our own paths in life, and I think one of the lessons is to learn to be present in the here and now and make the most of it, doing the best we can do in whatever roles we perform, and doing the best we can to not have excessive longing for another path.
Not that I have mastered that, for sure!! In case you missed, I recently posted on my blog about a wild hair I have to join the foreign service. Obviously, I am longing for a little adventure (of the non-familial type, that is)...remember in college when I said I wanted to join the Peace Corps? (And you laughed at me!)
I am glad your dad got to visit you! It sounds like you had a great time, even if "parting is such sweet sorrow."
Sorry about the long comment...you know how I get. ;-)
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